Chika Laju-okorodudu Written by Chika Laju-okorodudu · 2 min read >

In life no friendship leaves you neutral, one makes too many decisions some are deliberate while some are unconscious but eventually most choices have repercussions. Some of the choices include the choice of friendship and who we include in our space. This is because no friendship leaves you neutral.

What is friendship? Friendship is a relationship of mutual affection between people. It is a stronger form of interpersonal bond than an acquaintance or an association, such as a classmate, neighbour, coworker. From this definition above, we understand that the word friend is deeper than we use or generalize it. It also connotes that you cannot just meet someone, and, in a few minutes, you call him or her your friend.  

Friendship is built, you cannot know someone in a day. Although there is no manuscript on how long true friendship can be built as each one has its unique peculiarity but for me, I believe that it should always add value to your life regardless of how little. It should also be mutual, whatever you intend to take out of it, you should be willing to invest it too.

As simple as this sounds, your choice of friends can influence your life. It can affect your values, reasoning and ultimately your lifestyle. With this in mind, one should avoid a friendship that has a negative impact and could be toxic.

One of the biggest flags you will notice straight away is that toxic friends make you feel bad. Not just kind of guilty, or sometimes anxious. Toxic friends make you feel bad nearly all the time. This is because you never know where you stand. Toxic friends do not have a vested interest in making you feel welcome or secure, so you are a little bit on the edge with them. This constant uncertainty corrodes your trust levels, and the result is that you feel unhappy pretty much always.

Good friends encourage you to be your best self, even when it isn’t the obvious option.

To determine if your friends want to see you succeed or if they don’t care, you can try a test. Tell them that you have an important goal for yourself, it could be exercising, an exam, or even just completing a life motivating task. Then see how they react when they know these matters to you: how do they prompt you into success? If they don’t, that can be a sign they are a drain on your life.

Being a human, everyone needs someone who can support them in their ups and downs of life and that is what true friends are for. Each person gives different values to different persons in their life. There are so many ways a good friendship can impact positively in our lives. Some are:

By encouraging, motivating, supporting, listening, inspiring, genuine and constructive criticism and celebrating with one.

The list is exhaustive and like we always say, there is no manuscript to what pertains to a good friendship. One of the acid tests for me is peace and a safe place. Once I can feel free to pour myself to you with that inner peace that I will be constructively told the truth, it always works for me. In all, always make a wise decision in choosing your friend. This is because one wrong decision can spoil your future and take your life in a negative direction.



Written by Chika Laju-okorodudu
I am a Lawyer with a working experience in Human Resource Management. I love to explore and try new things... Profile


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