The Anchor on Love.

Johnpaul Okoroafor Written by Johnpaul Okoroafor · 1 min read >

I guess you opened this blog to see my love story. Don’t worry it is on the way. I am here to educate you. Yes you! It’s time you apply the decision making process to matters of your heart. However we must recognize “the anchor bias”. The Anchor Bias in decision making is a very common cognitive bias. According to Wikipedia, The anchoring effect is a cognitive bias  whereby an individual’s decisions are influenced by a particular reference point or ‘anchor’. Once the value of the anchor is set, subsequent arguments, estimates, etc. made by an individual may change from what they would have otherwise been without the anchor. 

 What causes these anchors? Many times, we develop these anchors from ideas we have learnt over time. That is, as we grow we are developing these anchors consciously or unconsciously. But let’s look at it from an emotional side of decision making. Can these anchor lead to a stereotype? Can anchoring influence your love life? These are questions you can answer. Let’s consider a case from a story of a nairalander. 

 I used to date this girl in 2008. She can be said to the the most beautiful lady I ever dated. She was head ove heels in love with me. I know this because back then I was a fresh graduate with no job and money wasn’t coming from home anymore and she has very rich parents. I mean the father has a whole road named after him in the tushed part of Lagos Island. 

I know she loved me because of ythe way she respects me and was always wanting to see me. 

In my house she was accepted though my brothers were suspicious, my father was really fond ofher and all. Issues started when I got a job in Lagos. She complains I close late, I don’t have time and I always took the pain to explain to her (I totally hate nagging. I would rather sleep on the street than ssleep onthe same bed with a nagging woman)

One day she called me up and told to meet her in a restaurant on Allen Ave. I saw her park this new Mistibushi SUV behind my car. When I asked her what happened to her car, she said he boyfriend just got her the new Mistibushi and she won’t be seeing me anymore. I tried to act mature. We ate and we went our separate ways. I felt bad for weeks. Though I still kept intouch, I begged her repeatedly to come backto me. Whenever my dad asks after he, I always lied that she’s out of the country. 

The whole experience made me loose faith in the woman gender and all. I’ve dated over 6 girls since then but that was the most painful of mybreakups because she said I didn’t do anything wrong but she has to move on.

The case above shows us a case of an anchor developing. This anchor may lead to a stereotype and In turn lead to biased decision taking process when picking his next love. Now that’s analysis of emotional problems.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.

%d bloggers like this: