IMA ETTE YE EKA

Father and Mother

What do you think is more essential in a child’s life than money? Emotional availability!

You see, there are many components to human psychology – mental, emotional, and physical dimensions, to name a few. At infancy, all these aspects are also undeveloped, so every element of the child’s development must be addressed by the parents. Most of the time, financial resources are only sufficient to meet physical necessities. What about mental and emotional requirements? You owe it to your children to teach them the meaning of unconditional love.

They pick such languages from you and put them into practice on others. You can’t adore them just because they do what you desire. You have a responsibility to love them as their parents, especially when they don’t do what you desire. This isn’t to say you don’t teach discipline. It simply implies that you do it while expressing your affection for them. You must demonstrate that a person’s true self is their actions, so let your language be love.

Recognize that your children are individuals who will form their thoughts, beliefs, philosophies, and hobbies separate from yours. Rather than trying to constrain them, it is your role as a parent to guide them to that realization. They will never be able to accept responsibility for their actions if you constrain them, above all, they will never mature to make independent decisions. This is a common occurrence among the girlchild – the heavy policing on the gender. Trying to structure her so that she does not turn ‘wayward’ makes her excessively reliant on others to make decisions.

Recognize that both the mother and father play a role in the life of a kid. Pseudoscience will have you believe that gender difference is only designed by social construct. Indeed, there are social conceptions to gender difference, but there are also biological differences. The absence of a mother figure in a child’s life has a significant impact on the child’s development, primarily in terms of emotional development. Similarly, the absence of a father figure in a child’s development has significant ramifications, especially in terms of decision-making. (I’m not implying that single parenting isn’t effective) but if it’s possible, plan to have a father/ mother figure in your children’s lives.

Plan before kids – there is no excuse for not doing this. This is the 21st century! Know the number of kids you want and how they fit into your life. It is your responsibility to meet your children’s basic requirements. By providing your children with the necessities of life, you are not doing them a favor, so avoid belittling them or making them feel guilty for relying on you to survive. Rather, teach them to be grateful, not indebted for your provision. Indebtedness causes a slew of mental health issues. Many young adults are so concerned with making their parents “proud” that they are willing to defy society to do so.

Until the next read, sending you good vibes!

Disclosure: I am not a parent, please take my view with a grain of salt.