Moboluwape Moradeyo Written by Moboluwape Moradeyo · 1 min read >

I attended a course recently on Emotional Intelligence and I must confess it was an insightful session.

Emotions are fundamental to human life. Most of the time our behaviour and actions are direct influence of our emotions and which if not well managed can cost us a great deal.

The goal is to get to a point where we are not ruled by our emotions.


Emotional intelligence is the capacity to perceive, control and express one’s emotions and to decode and respond appropriately to the emotions of others. It is the ability to understand and manage your own emotions, and those of the people around you.


1. It helps your networking and people relationship skills.

2.  It helps leaders to be authentic communicators and inspirers.

3. Emotional intelligence is what makes the difference between those who move up in life.

4. Helps one to move from a manager to a leader.

It is the strongest driver of leadership and personal excellence. It is also effective both in a relationship and other areas of life

Emotional intelligence keeps growing. It can always be improved upon by learning and practice.


A proper understanding of the six basic emotions is necessary to aid the knowledge of emotional intelligence.

These basic emotions and their characteristics are listed below:

1. Fear: Fear is a powerful emotion that can also play an important role in survival. When you are afraid your face will be white.

2. Surprise: When you are surprised your eyebrow lifts to open your eyes to the unexpected event

3. Happy: When you are happy it puts you at peace and makes you overcome any worrisome thoughts

4. Sadness: In sadness, the energy drops and helps to cope with the situation. With time it heals and the energy is regained.

5. Disgust: This is a sense of distaste. When you are disgusted it looks as if you want to spit out what is disgusting to you.

6. Anger: When you are angry, blood flows into your hand. Anger is the most seductive of all emotions because whatever you do out of anger you believe it is justified.

We must note that the two minds-The head or rational brain, the mind that thinks and the heart, the emotional brain are interconnected and always conflicting. Anyone that can control the emotional brain is emotionally intelligent.


We need to develop competency in these four key areas to become emotionally intelligent

  • Self-awareness- This is the ability to focus on yourself and how your actions, thoughts, or emotions do or don’t align with your internal standards
  • Self-management– Ability to use your emotional awareness to control your emotions and direct your behaviour.
  • Social Awareness-Ability to pick up emotions in others and your environment and understand what is happening. Having emotional empathy.
  • Relationship management- Using self and social awareness to manage interactions and develop others.


  • Emotional self-control
  • Patience
  • Ability to control impulsive behaviour
  • Delayed gratification
  • Be calm under pressure
  • Assertiveness
  • High ethical outlook
  • Optimism in the face of failure

As a leader, having emotional intelligence is essential for success. It is important for everyone who is ready to grow.

Thank you for reading.



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