Insights on Relationships in Nigeria (part2)

Olasubomi Alli-Balogun Written by Olasubomi Alli-Balogun · 1 min read >

The struggles of dating in Nigeria for a man is crazy, although not as hard for a lady but can be equally hard, I am kind of torn in between selecting which gender gets it worse than the other. We have to deal with dating the wrong person, the first heartbreak changes a man, there is this anger you have deep inside, sometimes you can be conscious of this, and most times, people do not notice they are angry, you just find yourself angry at women, whoever you date at that moment gets to experience and see a lot, suffer a great deal. Personally, I always advise people to take time off after every break-up, you have to unlearn, heal and fix most of the things you did wrong in your last relationship. My first heartbreak was at the age of 19, even though I was older, I still feel she was more experienced and I was naïve, innocent, and did not know a lot, as usual, it ended in tears, annoying part was she cheated with a friend.

Dating while being broke, hmmn, this topic is a very sensitive topic for guys, dating in Nigeria as a broke guy is a real struggle, now this depends on if you are dating someone curvy, fine, sexy and beautiful, you have different guys trying to attract he with money, on her birthday, the gifts she gets are much more expensive than what you can get her, organizing a party for her is out of it. Then you also have her girls convincing her to date someone that has money, trying to hook her up with different guys, basically, it feels like all odds are against you. Dating while being broke, what can you offer a woman? The only thing that comes to mind is an act of service and that is what every guy focuses on, picking the right person that does not broke-shame a man, means he is very lucky, finding someone that will stick around when you cannot offer much, stay over when there is no food in the kitchen, no light. At this point in a man’s life, if he is lucky to find someone that stays with him, in my opinion, he has found true love, at this point, it is obvious she wants you not what you can offer od do for her.

Dating while being rich, this stage in a man’s life is confusing, you start to have standards, in the sense that you cannot date anybody, whoever you are dating has to be financially stable, that is probably the only way things can work out in the relationship. Dating someone broke, you start to wonder if all the sweet words, acts of service are based on the financial aids she is getting from you or if she truly loves you, finding true love or someone that has your interest at heart is hard, money rules the world, some will claim to love you but the minute the money stops flowing, true love is out of the window. As a man, you will meet so many in your lifetime, women like gifts, outings, celebrating grand birthday parties, going clubbing, you start to wonder why you get only boxers, singlets, belts as gifts but she want

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