GETTING A GRIP ON EMOTIONS

Emotion is a feeling that can emanate from a person’s mood, situation, or relationship with others. Emotion if not properly managed or controlled can degenerate into unpleasant scenarios. Getting a grip on emotions is a vital skill to poses, it looks trivial, and I had always assumed that maturity automatically guides you in getting a grip on emotions. However, after our classes on emotional intelligence in Lagos business school brush up sessions, my line of thought on it was further enlightened.

Psychology defined emotions as a complex reaction pattern involving experiential, behavioural and psychological elements. That sounds like too much English simply put, it is believed that the type of emotions a person experiences is determined by the circumstances that trigger the emotion. For example, A news of a promotion ideally should make one excited and elevate your mood to a happy state. Likewise, sudden news of a closely related person’s demise would abruptly distort one’s emotion into a sad and moody one. This analogy is logical and goes a long way to the initial definition that emotions are feelings that can emanate from someone’s mood.

In life, there is a limit to what we can control or influence and the golden rule to this is that life is 10% of what happens to us and 90 percent of how we choose to respond or react to it. What does this imply? The discrepancy between the margin of 90 and 10 percent summarizes the dynamics of the significant role one must intentionally play in filtering life situations from having such a heavy impact inwardly and ultimately destabilizing one’s emotions.

There are some hacks to imbibe that would help to manage emotions. Although each person and circumstances would always differ and some peculiarities of situations instigate some emotions. However, some of these would always help to a great extent:

1. Identify what you are feeling, you need to understand how you feel, and know when you are having a mood swing.
2. Understand or analyse why you are feeling that way. For you to address a situation, you need to know the root cause of why you feel that way.
3. Address it or deal with it: now when I say it like this, it may sound harsh or impracticable. The truth is that most times we sweep some realities under the carpet for so long because we are afraid to address them and it bottles up so much that when it outbursts, it would be difficult for us to contain or react properly to it. A way to manage emotions is by accessing them, talk to someone if you need to, take a deep breath, think through them. You can even talk to yourself through a mirror, affirm yourself, take time out, rest and practice your speech or composure as the situation requires.

An added point I use that always works personally is not to rely so much on human beings, this always works because they tend to disappoint a lot. This would keep you heartbroken and might have a toll on your emotions.

In conclusion, Getting a grip on emotions is something we all need to learn. I was elated to know that emotional intelligence was a part of our syllabus in Lagos business school because it dwelled on topics that even though they were not technical or involved too many calculations. The knowledge and skills acquired from it would guide you into navigating the other technical aspects of life and most importantly managing people.