Emotional intelligence (EI) is the ability to understand and manage one’s emotions. It is also the capacity to perceive, control, express one’s emotions and respond appropriately to the emotions of others.
Prior to my knowledge of this, I am a person that is quick to pick faults, without trying to understand the rationale behind why someone could behave in a certain way, especially when I feel in my judgment that they had acted irrationally.
There is this saying that not all are born to rule. When we hear this saying in a community where we aspire to lead, we may not understand why others are chosen over us. Emotional intelligence is the strongest driver of leadership and personal excellence. It is the major predictor of life s quotient. It will help you communicate and inspire others. My knowledge of this has sharpened how I relate with people. The understanding of showing empathy and not talking down on others without being emotionally intelligent about why things were done differently is a major learning point for me.
One may ask, can you be emotionally intelligent while driving on Lagos Road? my answer is yes. We sometimes wonder why someone will obstruct the flow of traffic just because another car hit his / her car. We see this many times on the road. At that moment he/she is fuelled with emotions and this part of the brain called the brain stem is what is at work. It is the brain associated with reflex action.
There are six basic emotions: Fear, Anger, sadness, happiness, surprise, and disgust. our bodies react to these emotions in different ways.
Let us look at anger. When we are angry blood flows to our hands, making it easier for us to grab a weapon or be ready to punch. This is the most seductive of all emotions. If this emotion is not handled properly, one can find himself getting into trouble or acting irrationally. At times we see ourselves fighting over things we should have overlooked. We are often advised not to take actions in anger because it has proven that decisions taken while angry are not always the best. In order not to act irrationally, while angry we can adopt the following: keeping quiet, practicing impulse control by taking a deep breath, counting from 1-100, or even singing a song. These are some of the ways we can manage anger and save ourselves from acting in ways we may regret.
There are four components of emotional intelligence: self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship management. Our ability to imbibe these components will make us emotionally intelligent and function better as a person. A high level of self-management will enable one to have self-control, be patient as well as manage stress. we also need to be socially alert.
I believe that change starts with me, if I can act differently, it will reflect on people around me and that is how the circle will keep increasing and we will have a world of emotionally intelligent people.
Launch into the deep