FATHERHOOD..

“Daddy, can I drive your car?”

“Daddy, how did you meet mummy?”

“Daddy, is it for only parents?”

I haven’t had to answer as many questions in my lifetime, but when my little daughter asks you a question, you must answer – for your peace!!

She would not stop asking until she gets answers. Nothing prepares anyone for this; not the stories I have heard about fatherhood nor the lovely tips in the book my Mum gave me when she found out that my wife was pregnant. Well, truth be told, I didn’t finish reading the book. I scoffed at the idea that some guys, who knew nothing about fatherhood on this side of the world, were telling me how to be a father. 

I still recalled the day Daddy’s girl arrived – I got a phone call while driving to work. My wife was in labour. She had been all night but did not want to bother me since the earliest I could get to Lagos from Abuja was the next morning. I was miffed that she did not tell me early. I would have been on the 7am flight to Lagos. Here I was on my way to the office while trying to book the next available flight to Lagos. I had always wanted to witness the delivery of my first child, and now I was going to miss it, because if she laboured all night, how would I ever get there on time?

I finally arrived at the hospital later in the evening after series of flight delays and the baby had not come. My wife barked orders about getting the doctor, not standing around, or the other ones I couldn’t make out. I understood perfectly well. She had gone through the pain of labour all night and the baby had refused to come. Less than an hour after I got to the hospital, we were already smiling and congratulatory wishes were flying around. Everyone agreed that the baby was only waiting for me to witness her delivery, just the way I wanted.

Our bond has grown stronger ever since. She has just celebrated her 10^th year birthday. I have enjoyed every part of the growth process, especially the part that calls me to a higher level of responsibility in speaking up for the girl child and fighting for gender equality. I am blessed to have great examples of ladies doing well for themselves around me; it’s reassuring to see that the world is getting better for the girl child. She’s more heard, expressive and she’s doing more. She’s breaking barriers and achieving her goals, despite how difficult some people of my gender tend to make it. Having a daughter has also made me more conscious about how I treat women around me. I’m her first experience of relating with a man. I have the task to show her how well she deserves to be treated.

Fatherhood is one of the best things that has happened to me. I’m learning every day to become a better version of myself, not just for myself, but also for the young innocent girl who looks up to me and believes I am a model for men. So, I’ll keep doing better…#EMBA28