Things are changing at an almost dizzying pace for me.
With an evolution of responsibilities at work and the demands of the MBA, the task of maintaining presence and performance across the work, school, and home fronts without getting overwhelmed by the sheer load of it all is one not spoken of enough. Even less discussed is how to navigate it all when it gets too much.
To be honest, there have been days when I have asked myself if I made the right choice at the right time. These days seem to be occurring more frequently lately.
Not to say I do not relish the challenge, because I do. However, as someone that strives for excellence in all spheres of my life; both personal and professional, the thought of keeping the desired levels of performance across both is beginning to raise my anxiety.
While Psychology tells us that some performance anxiety is good as it connotes interest in the activity and can be a precursor for above-average performance in some cases, the current levels of anxiety I am experiencing might be something else altogether.
So, what to do?
As a mostly self-reliant person, this presents as quite a conundrum as I have always believed that one must always rise to the challenges of life. Amongst other sayings I guide my thoughts and deeds with, “No retreat, No surrender” is one I regularly motivate myself with as the tough days get tougher.
On some days, “No retreat, No surrender” is not anywhere near enough. On some days, it seems easier, and more attractive, to just pack it in, call it a day and leave the MBA program to focus on work and the family.
To get through these days, I remind myself of why I chose to take on the program. I tell myself that I knew it was never going to be a walk in the park, and that there will be days when it will seem like it’s all too much, too soon.
On the days when these reminders are not enough, I reach out to my best friend and have a heart-to-heart chat about what I am thinking and feeling. This always does the trick as we can relate to each other’s struggles, have motivated each other at low points in our personal and professional lives, and have been there for major life events over sixteen years of close friendship.
The last time I called him, he reminded me of how much I had achieved in the time we have known each other, how much I have grown, and how I had done all this against the odds.
I thanked him and mulled over his words.
While his words lifted my spirits, it did more than just that. Upon deeper reflection, I recognized that I had a well of strength that I did not easily recognize due to my fixation on the challenges of the moment.
In all of this, I think I have added an invaluable weapon into my arsenal through my best friend’s reminders: that I can rise to whatever challenge life presents and that help is never far away from me when I need it. All I need to do is ask.
