NEXT OF KIN
The title of this article may seem controversial, and what it means may be relative to various individuals based on experiences and what they perceive it to be. But in general, a next of kin is a person’s closest living relative through blood or legal relationships. It goes beyond saying that this could include a person’s wife, husband, father, mother, brothers, sisters, etc.
Ideally, when talking about next of kin, what comes to mind is the person you trust the most to handle your affairs in the event of an unfortunate event or even demise. In the case of marriage, which I want to center on in this article, your wife or husband should be your next of kin. Are there some exceptions to this? Yes, but that is cases where there is already a breach of trust, divorce issues, or maybe such a person is incapable beyond a reasonable doubt.
An ideal marriage should have a foundation of trust; your spouse and children should always come first in whatever decision. Many issues have arisen as a result of making an extended family member next of kin, especially when the spouse is still alive and everything seems to be going well.
There have been many stories of cases whereby a spouse, most times the wife, shows up as the next of kin in the event of the husband’s demise, only to be met by a rude shock that she isn’t the next of kin but rather the husband’s brother or maybe father. Issues like this get one thinking, especially in the part of the world where in-laws do not care about the welfare of the widow of a family member; all they care about is how to share money and properties, and then sadly, as an educated person, knowing fully well this may happen still give extended family members the power to do so. When eventualities like this come up, the widow, as the case may be, is usually left with nothing, sent out of her husband’s house, and has restricted access to funds and accounts. Some in-laws (who happened to be made next of kin) even come up with the excuse that if the widow has full access to her husband’s fund, she will give it to another man she intended to remarry to so they make such widow be at their mercy.
To married men, learn to think of the welfare of your immediate family when you are gone and don’t put them at the mercy of your family. People know better but choose to do the wrong thing. To married women, try as much as possible to be involved or follow up on decisions about who is next of kin and not assume it is you; learn to ask questions. Yes, some men may be shady, but as they say, women always have their way around things. To in-laws, it is not your money; tone down the greed.
The thrust of this write-up is for every individual to always think of the future. Please think of how your family, especially your children, will fare after you have gone by putting your affairs in order in a way that will favour them.
#MMBA5
