Decision-making is everybody’s business. Not deciding in itself is a decision. We are faced with myriads of options in our daily lives and whether make decisions either consciously or unconsciously. Everything we do is anchored on our choices from when we wake up to when we sleep at night. The good thing is that decision-making can be learned like every other skill. We can improve our decision-making and make good choices to enhance our lives.
If you have ever fallen in love before, you will know that some of those decisions are not based on reason. I have seen a case of a boyfriend constantly battering the girlfriend, and the girlfriend always makes a case for the boyfriend. Whenever she sought advice, she only looked for advice that confirmed her position: “Oh, he is not that bad; he can be better; we all have weaknesses; you do not know if the other person will be worse”. My former boss will come up with a position, even though it could be a weak one; after presenting the argument, she will then conclude with something like, “I think this is one of the best ideas, don’t you think so?” Even if I disagree with the position, it is challenging to oppose an argument like that. The examples above are what is called confirmation bias.
Confirmation bias comes in different ways and manners- and in all aspects of human lives. We like people to confirm our prejudice and our choices. The reason is simple- we choose what we want first before choosing why we want it. In the examples above, there ought to be objectives and the criteria you are looking for in your choices and match all your options based on the requirements. Instead, we will choose an alternative and try to prove why the selection is good. In our native parlance, we call it wuruwuru to the answer. The second reason is that we tend to lean towards what we like, or it is easy for us than what we dislike. We are drawn to information that supports our subconscious leaning.
This is not to say you shouldn’t make choices you are attracted to, but so that you are sure you are making a wise and informed choice. You need to do the following to avoid falling into a confirmation trap.
- Be sure that you are weighing all the options with equal rigour. You are not dismissing positions that do not support your bias. But you are also considering those options and willing to stick with the one that makes more sense.
- Get someone you respect to play the devil’s advocate by bringing forth arguments that oppose your positions.
- Do not ask leading questions as my former boss did. Just present two or more options and let them advise you. It may be difficult if it is a boss-report relationship because the report might seek favour and want to agree with everything you say. Don’t surround yourself with yes-men. When they destroy you, you will not know.
- Always check your motives to make sure you are doing the right thing. Check with some positions you have made in the past, and ask yourself why you have changed your position.
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