Communication is the process of exchange of ideas, thoughts, knowledge, opinions and data from a resender to a receiver so that the message is received and understood with clarity and purpose.
Listening just like reading are the receivers’ activities in the communication process.
Listening may be defined as the perception or real understanding of whatever has been communicated. One cannot be a hundred percent sure of it because perceptions or understanding differs from person to person. Without listening or reading communication is not complete.
It takes intentionality and concentration to be a good listener as it’s not a skill most human are born with. Naturally the tendency to interrupt or get distracted, or to make a tangential comment in the course of a conversation is relatively higher.
Active listening and Reflective Response are very great ways of improving our listening skills, we need to be good listeners to be our best as managers, consultant, leaders or even in our personal lives.
Active Listening is a term used to describe a general approach to listening that helps us gain more information, improve our understanding of the other points of view, and work cooperatively with others in our daily lives, both our superiors, subordinates and peers.
Some of the great tips given by JoAnne on Active Listening and Reflective Response are:
- Looks and Sounds interested: This talks about showing of interest in the speaker and the topic being discussed, it encourages the speaker to talk more extensively and and to elaborate and clarify thoughts and feelings.
One of the ways we can do this is by maintaining occasional eye contacts, but not doing all the time as an excessive eye contact can also have a negative influence on the speaker.
We also, need to maintain a body position and facial expression that shows attentiveness and, not boredom. Nodding occasionally to show we are understanding and interested in message.
Using vocalization such as “uh-huh” and yes can encourage a speaker. While avoiding any distracting behaviour like drawing, playing with pen, our phones or any other distractive acts.
- Adopts the Speaker’s Point of View: This talks about trying to see things from the speaker’s point of view. Listening attentively, not interrupting, finish sentences or rush the speaker.
Doing all we can to understand the speakers perceptive, while waiting for an opportunity if any to present our own views.
- Clarifying the Speaker’s thoughts and feelings: This is by asking open ended questions that encourages the speaker to shield more light.
REFLECTIVE RESPONSES
Is designed to elicit as full a sense as possible of the speakers’ thoughts and feelings. It is a way of helping someone explore her own personal meanings.
This involves reflecting back to the speaker what we believe they said in order to verify or clarify our understanding and to encourage the speaker to continue elaborating on their point of view.
Some of the tips are:
- Reflect the speakers’ thoughts and feelings: This talks about restating what we believe the speaker has said to check for the accuracy of our understanding or even more importantly to reflect back the speakers’ feelings as we have heard or inferred them.
We can do this by using wording or voice tone to make our inferences into questions, rather than statements.
- Respond rather that lead the conversation: This is by responding to and reflecting back what was actually said or what we sense was implied by what was said, we do this by trying to stay within the speakers frame of reference, rather than asking questions or making suggestions that comes from our own reference.
- Respond to feelings, rather than content: This talks about choosing the specific personal points rather than the abstract generalizations to respond to and reflect back at the speaker.
REFLECTIVE vs DIRECTIVE RESPONSES
This talks about when more than just being reflective there is need for us to be directive by asking certain questions to broaden our knowledge and understanding.
Times like, when we need to understand the other persons feelings more completely. Etc
